Monday, October 27

Letter to my inaanak...

10 October 2008

Dear Rafael,

Hi! Ninong Jun ‘to...

It’s been quite a while since we last saw each other, and I’d bet you’re now having a hard time remembering my face...

Anyways, I learned from your father that you’re doing well in school, and that is very good news! Keep up the good work. We always believe that all of you (our children) will always do well being part of this family.

I learned that you are going to a retreat activity this weekend and I decided that this is an opportune time to share with you some of my experiences. I believe knowing them will become handy for you as you become more mature and continue on your journey…

Firstly, I’d tell you that in your age right now, communication is the key. I believe that most guys your age get the rebellious nature by not communicating properly and thus feel that they are alienated. Rafael, you should not fall to the same trap. There are just too many people whom you can talk to, your parents being at the forefront. Don’t hesitate to talk to them and discuss whatever it is that you feel you should tell them. You’ll be amazed at how far they’d go and how far they’ll be willing to listen.

Fael, I also want to share with you a truth that I discovered long ago – that our parents only want what’s best for us. I’m not saying that you just follow every whim and order of your father and mother, what I’m telling you is to reflect on them, and try to integrate them with the things that you want for yourself. Being independent is well and good, but striking the right balance between your independence and your parent’s guidance will give you the best choices.

Right now, you’re well on your way to becoming an adult. I know for sure that the transition, even though difficult for some, will be a stroll in the park for you. You’re blessed with beautiful and loving parents who are there to comfort and guide you every step of the way. In a way, I envy them because we cannot do that for your cousin River. In River’s case, we have to let him feel our care and love thru technologies which are not always easy. Anyways, my point is, as it is right now, you have your own dreams and ambitions, and the question is, how do you achieve them?

I would not say I’m an expert on these things, but let me share several points that I feel will be important in attaining your dreams:

1. Do what makes you happy. If you feel doing something is a burden, leave it. It will just be wasted effort on your part, which eventually will not contribute to your life’s goals.
2. Your family should take top priority. When life’s trials and tribulations come, believe me, they’ll be there always to support you. While at it, try to get loyal friends, they’re hard to come by these days, but you can build some by being loyal and trustful also.
3. Honesty and Integrity are very important. There will come times in which you have to choose between two sides. You have to choose one, and fight for it. Nothing in this world is wrong; there are just opposing interests and ideas. Your will and conviction will determine your character.
4. Always remember the Golden Rule – Do not do unto others what you don’t want them to do to you. I learned not so long ago that this is still true in the world. That however difficult and dire your situation is at the moment, eventually, you’ll reap what you sow. As a good professor once said, “Do good things and the Karma will take care of itself. The dreams will come to you.”

Lastly Fael, I want to always put your trust in God. As I experienced it myself, there are no coincidences and everything happens for a reason. Always come back to Him and He’ll direct you and guide you.

These words may probably be vague in a way for you Fael, but try to remember even some of them. You’ll find out one day that they can be treasures, as I have found them in different stages of my life.
Until then.

Take care always,
Ninong Jun